I’ve been working probably harder than I’ve ever worked lately. It’s weird. I’m on overdrive and it just doesn’t seem to be enough. The bar keeps getting raised and raised and raised … and I know we’re the only team doing this crap. I’m getting tired and tired quickly of this unending pace.
Before the transfer I worked 7 day weeks. No big deal, really, when you have 7 days you can space them out. It was also pretty static. I knew exactly what I was getting into and knew what I was doing every day of the week. Life was pretty easy. With the transfer, the rules changed. It was one of those “everything you thought you knew about your job was a lie” type of deals.
I thought I used to work hard. I realize now that it was good times, easy times and probably better times, even with all the B.S. I know that I’m on a better team now, I know that for sure, it’s just harder work and harder times. I don’t dread signing on like I used to. BUT, on the other hand, my mind is back to work. I can’t just sign out and it’s done.
So in a round about way, I’ve been doing updates here on Saturday nights quite a bit because I’m usually out of hours for the week and it makes no sense to go in and put my mind on work when they’re not paying me for extra hours (and never will).
Saturdays are an escape from the week. I’ve been under pressure. I’m trying to juggle a lot of things besides work. There’s the never-ending video projects. There’s COH, there’s responsibilities here too, plus dozens of friendships and relationships that need attention. I’m afraid something’s going to happen and I’m just going to slip up and lose things. Either my job or friendships or whatever. Like that shoe is coming to drop and I know it.
It’s not really new, it’s been this way since late May. My vacation then getting sick really screwed things over. I don’t know if I’m over extended or what but I do know something has to change so I start getting more “me” time.
New project lately: brushing the dog’s teeth. Both just had to have their teeth cleaned again. The doctor decided I was to brush their teeth every day or every other day. You know what? I knew I would get roped into it because you can’t trust my dad to do this and my mom’s never here. So here I am, once a day, trying to keep the dogs from biting me as I try to brush their teeth.
My friend Wendy says that all you really have to do is spread the toothpaste around and coat the teeth. So I’m trying that. Roscoe is getting used to it. He’s not trying to bite me any more. He has this pained expression on his face when he realizes that it’s time for the brushing, but he doesn’t try to run. Thor, on the other hand, makes life miserable every time. Every time.
Finishing a DVD now on the other machine. I should be in COH. I said I’d go in earlier and have been trying all night. Getting the dreaded “can’tconnectdbserver” error. So I’ve been trying to get in every 15 minutes. Not working. Probably won’t work tonight and there’s not a damn thing I can do to fix it.
I think I’ll try COH one more time after this DVD finishes. If I can’t go in, WWE Smackdown, here I come. I feel like destroying things.