The Ring Report TV Update 9/25/94 Vol. 1, No. 82
(::YAWN!:: Oh, it’s WCW Saturday Night . . . oh joy.)
RUMORS FROM THE WRESTLING HOTLINES By Jeff Brown
WWF: Estimates have SummerSlam having between 205,000 and 310,000 buys . . . CRUSH is officially back in the WWF as he replaces YOKOZUNA for a few dates in the United Kingdom . . . Talk of OWEN HART turning back to fan favorite . . . Radio WWF (remember that?) was canceled as of July 17th . . . Congrats go out to BILLY GUNN as he just had a son . . .
WCW: RON SIMMONS and SHANGHAI PIERCE have been giving their notices . . . The WCW has changed their Madison Square Garden card to the Meadowlands Arena due to the WWF . . . The connection with ECW is over for now . . . and finally, some of the proceeds from the Halloween Havoc PPV will be donated to the MUHAMMID ALI foundation . . .
USWA WRESTLING 9/18/94 by CRUNGE
WHAT YOU MISSED: USWA finally spent some money and have new graphics when they announce “today’s matches” . . . a JERRY LAWLER video to “Glory Days” . . . clips of the previous week’s attack by BUDDY LANDEL and TOMMY RICH on one of the MOONDOGS . . . MOONDOGS beat ELIMINATORS by DQ when Rich, Landel, and manager SCOTT BOWDEN attacked; BRIAN CHRISTOPHER made the save with a board; one of the ‘Dogs juiced, which is always nice to see . . . a SID VICIOUS video . . . DOUG BASHAM (a very small rookie) came out to face Sid; Sid called Basham to the table and asked him to just leave so Sid wouldn’t have to hurt him; Basham said the only way to be a champ was to fight a champ, and went back to the ring; Sid lamented that he would now have to teach the kid a lesson, and destroyed Basham with a chokeslam and then a powerbomb; Sid actually got CHEERED for much of this match, and afterwards said he ruled the world . . . BRIAN CHRISTOPHER came out to talk about DOUG GILBERT; he said there was an unmasking match with the DARK PATRIOT (Doug Gilbert) coming up, and he would prove to the world it was Doug Gilbert . . . Scott Bowden came out, saying the Dark Patriot was not Doug Gilbert, and if Christopher would get in the ring, he could fight the DP right then; Christopher then beat the DP, but it was just some jobber, as the “real” DP attacked Christopher after the match; Christopher cleared the ring with a chain . . . Rich and Landel came out to talk about the Moondogs, then went to fight PG-13 (once again the tag champs) when the Moondogs came out with a trashcan, and ended up fighting Rich and Landel in the parking lot . . . a clip of THE PHANTOMS (Tragedy and Sorrow) with FANTASIA (some rasslin’ babe) . . . PG-13 talked about the Phantoms, and stayed on to do commentary while the PHANTOMS defeated EDRICK HINES and EDDIE GIVENS; after the match, Fantasia puts a rose on the defeated person . . . the Phantoms went to the desk and shoved PG-13, but a ref. broke things up . . . SPELLBINDER beat CORY WILLIAMS . . .
WWF MONDAY NIGHT RAW 9/19/94 by BRYAN FISHER
WHAT YOU MISSED: LEX LUGER had trouble with a prelim . . . DUKE “THE DUMPSTER” DROESE beat JERRY LAWLER buy countout when Jerry chased DINK around the ringside area . . . THE HEAVENLY BODIES beat 2 Losers . . . Vinnie interviewed “GRUMPY” BOB BACKLUND, who applied the Funky Chicken Wing on some guy, as he screamed in pain VINCE MCMAHON & RANDY SAVAGE jumped in to break it up . . . BOB “SPARKY PLUG” HOLLY plugged up a prelim . . . YOKOZUNA flattened PHIL APOLLO . . .
WWF HOUSE SHOW SAN JOSE 9/22/94 by DAVID TAUB
At 7:30, the lights go down, the hart-shaped lasers go off, and a loud heartbeat comes over the p.a. The ring announcer introduces “Dr.” Manny Garcia, as they two are the hosts for the evening. During the card, they constantly remind us of WWF merchandise, cheering, etc.
Well Dunn vs. 1-2-3 Kid & Bob “Spark Plug” Holly
Well Dunn sucks, plain and simple. They did their double-team, behind the ref.’s back stuff. Kid tagged in, house-of-fire, spin kicks, etc. End came when Holly tried a sunset flip on the brunette, the blond held him up, Kid clothelsined the blond one, and Holly got the pin. Kid/Holly d. Well Dunn by pin, *1/2
Abe “Knucklehead” Schwartz vs. Louie Spicoli
This is a disgrace to wrestling. Schwartz only did two good moves, a neck breaker, and something else. This match was so boring, I began a “lets go Sharks” chant. Schwartz d. Spicoli by pin, negative DUD
IC Title Match, Champ Razor Ramon vs. Owen “King of” Hart
Hart did not come out with Neidhart. Jim didn’t even show up during the match. Hart had his spots (drop-kick, etc.) but also used rest holds. Razor broke out of the sleeper, knocked Owen out of the ring, and followed him. They fought, and Owen bladed himself, and did a bad-looking JUICE job. Owen slid in the ring, and the bell rung. It was announced Owen won via countout. Owen grabbed the mic, called Razor a wuss, and challenged him back into the ring. A la Jarrett vs. Tatanka, Ramon got back into the ring, beat up on Owen, and put him into an ugly Razor’s Edge. Ramon d. Hart via pin after restart of match, **1/2
World Tag Champs Shawn Michaels & Diesel vs. The Head Shrinkers Shawn and Diesel are the best. The intros took 10 min. alone, as Shawn was first brought out, did his striptease, then when the match started, Shawn went up to Samu, and said “ooga ooga booga” I was ROTLF. Shawn took some major bumps. He got thrown out of the ring, and took out two security rails. Amazing!!! Shawn is the best!!! Anyway, D & S beat up on Samu, destroying the crap out of him. Shawn gave him some apron-to-floor elbow drops. Finally Samu was able to tag out after 10 min., Fatu went house of fire, ref. (Hebner) takes a bump. Shawn takes bump out of ring. ‘Shrinkers pin Diesel, but no count. Try for a Samoan Splash, but Michaels recovers and knocks Fatu off the ropes. Takes a tag belt, and uses it on him — nut he misses and wallops Diesel. Fatu covers, covers, only to a two. Samu comes back into the ring, takes the other belt, and nails D & S with them. Hebner DQ’s them. Shrinkers leave them for dead. It appeared that D & S would come to blows, but they didn’t. The raised their arms in victory Michaels & Diesel d. Head Shrinkers by DQ in 18:03, ****
I participated in the Bearer contest. They took ten of us into the ring to give our tries. I got booed vigorously. But my entrance was cool. I climbed the ropes and jumped in. The roadie went nuts, yelling never to do that again.
WWF Women’s Champ Alundra Blayze vs. Bull Nakano (w/Luna Vachon)
Bull had all the good spots, including having Blayze draped over the top rope, and giving her a DDT. The same match on TV as always. Blayze d. Bull via pin, **
World champ Bret Hart vs. Jim Neidhart
Owen was not involved at all. Neidhart is a stiff. He attacked Hart once he got to the ring. He controlled early. Then Bret had his spots (knee drop, side suplex, etc.) back to Jim, and Bret finished up around the 10 min. mark with his series of moves, ending with the sharpshooter. Bad predictable match. Hart d. Neidhart via submission, **1/2
Casket Match (no countout, no DQ) Yokozuna (w/Fuji) vs. Undertaker (w/ Paul Bearer)
The casket is deep and wide, but it opened right in front of me, so I couldn’t see what happened. Usual stuff between these two, but no ButZai drop. Yoko gave Undie a couple of good chairshots and UT returned the favor. End came when Undie gave Yoko the chair, and he fell into the opened casket. UT d. Yoko, ***1/2
Notes: Bull now has Kamala’s old music . . . The Anoia clan were on hand to see their family in action . . . Next time around: Dec. 3 at the Cow Palace . . .
IWCCW 9/19/94 BY DAVID TAUB
WHAT YOU MISSED: TONY RUMBLE is the host, with PAUL JACOWITZ & RICK LLOYD doing voice over commentary . . . KEVIN SULLIVAN & TAZMANIAC and VIC “THE DRAGGIN'” STEAMBOAT & TOMMY DREAMER brawled to a no contest, when the fought back to the dressing room . . . Videos of THE CANDY MAN (not BRAD ARMSTRONG) and SABU (YESSSS!!!!) . . . “Boston Bad Boy” Tony Rumble vs. “THE NEW HAMPSHIRE NIGHTMARE” MOOSE MONTANA (w/ BULL MONTANA): Montana is a fat schlub who has been New England Champion for 4 years. Rumble comes to the ring with a helmet, like he is going to sneak-attack Montana, but he drops the helmet on the way in. He has to have a fan retrieve for him, and then Rumble goes on with the sneak attack. Rumble won the title, pinning Montana in 40 seconds . . . Rumble then denounced the ECW, calling it Egotistical Cheesy Wimps, for its involvement in the NWA Tourney (when SHANE DOUGLAS trashed the title) . . . THE TROUBLEMAKERS, BIG VAL & TOUGH TONY, beat LAZER & EL MASKARADO. After the match the latter team turned on each other, with the MASKARODO getting the better of the two . . . In the “main” event, HACKSAW DUGGAN defeated TONY ATLAS by DQ, when he pushed the referee . . .
SMOKY MOUNTAIN WRESTLING 9/21/94 by DENNIS MILLER
WHAT YOU MISSED: THIS REPORT IS DEDICATED TO THE MEMORY OF THE GWF: BRANDON BAXTER, may you find work elsewhere! . . . THE GANGSTAS and THE ROCK ‘N’ ROLL EXPRESS brawled all over Freedom Hall in Johnson City, TN. They even brawled out in the parking lot . . . This marks the first time in all my years of watching wrestling that I have seen someone power slammed onto a car . . . An interview with the Gangstas . . . BRUISER BEDLAM put out STEVE SKYFIRE . . . An interview with JIM CORNETTE and Bedlam . . . Later this month is SMW’S version of War Games, with Bruiser Bedlam, CHRIS CANDIDO and the Gangstas taking on the Rick ‘n’ Roll Express, TRACY SMOTHERS and THE DIRTY WHITE BOY . . . Highlights from last week’s match featuring Bruiser Bedlam and KILLER KYLE beating the Dirty White Boy and TRACY SMOTHERS . . . An interview with BOB ARMSTRONG . . . Next week Armstrong takes on Jim Cornette and Killer Kyle in a handicap match . . . The Dirty White Boy beat MIKE MURALDO . . . After the match, Bedlam attacked DWB and tried to whip him . . . Highlights from last week’s match between LANCE STORM and BOO BRADLEY . . . An interview with Lance Storm . . . Chris Candido and Boo Bradley beat Lance Storm and BRIAN LEE by count out . . .
WWF Sacramento Report and Fashion Update 9/23/94 by Tamera00
Okay, I was looking forward to this show for the sole reason the Bret “The Hitman” Hart was going to be there, so I was pretty much prejudiced against the other matches, but nonetheless, they were pretty boring!
Lemme start at the beginning. The first match was Bob “Spark Plug” Holly and the 1-2-3 Kid against Well Dunn. I decided it was time for cigarette break, so I wondered out of the arena. As I went outside, I realized I had paid money to see a freak show! There was a crowd of drug addict-looking men and women standing around, with their cigs in their hands. Maybe I am just naive to such things, but this put in somewhat of a shock. There I was, wearing a U2 tee-shirt and a plaid blazer, I stuck out like a sore thumb compared to the other women there — who were wearing skin tight jeans and 5 inch heels!
I though tight jeans and aqua-netted hair went out about 3 years ago!! I guess not. Oh well, I finished my cig and went back inside and Bob ” Spark Plug” Holly and 1-2-3 Kid won that match.
The next match was pretty good, KnuckleBall Schwartz against some jobber who looked like way overweight Curt Hennig. Well, the jobber pretty much did Knucklehead in, but somehow Knucklehead won the match, though the jobber came out of the match with the majority of the fan support.
Owen Hart vs. Razor Ramon was next, this also turned out to be a pretty decent match. They both stayed on each other equally for a while, but then they went outside the ring and Razor got counted out. Owen then tried to claim the title, but the referee and the announcer told him that he didn’t win it . . . blah blah blah . . . anyway, Owen grabs the mic and challenges Razor to continue the match, Razor hesitated and Owen taunted him until Razor finally got back into the ring. Owen started pounding on Razor as soon as he got into the ring, but Razor fought back and did a Razor’s Edge on Owen and won the match.
Next was another tag team match (boring), the Head Shrinkers vs. Shawn Michaels and Diesel. For the first 5-7 minutes Diesel dominated the match with the help of Shawn Michaels cheating and all that stuff, then the Head Shrinkers did something (I really wasn’t paying that much attention), to get back on their feet. After a while Shawn got the one of the championship belts and hit one of the Shrinkers upside the head with it, which didn’t do much. They proceeded to see-saw back and forth, and the Shrinkers got the belts and began hitting Shawn and Diesel with them, with a slightly better effect, but the ref. was watching this time and Shrinks got disqualified.
Intermission, for any women who are reading this and go to WWF shows — you are going to see wrestling, not a Skid Row concert! No need for spandex, stretch jeans, hair poofed up over 3 inches high, or spike heels. I am no fashion genius but jeez louise, is this really attractive to guys??
Okay, back to wrestling, next match: Alundra Blaze vs. Bull Nakano. Of course Luna, who was wearing something — not much though (and I though this was family entertainment! <g>), was at ringside. Bull totally whipped Alundra, but of course Alundra won . . .
Next (like I said, i wasn’t paying much attention), was the Bret Hart vs. Jim Neidhart match. Bret gets into the ring and Neidhart attacked him before he even took his jacket off. Owen runs in and both of them pound on Bret for a bit, then the referees get Owen to leave and after Bret recovers the actual match starts.
Bret pretty much dominated the match with a few exceptions, Bret had Jim in the Sharpshooter, and Owen reappeared and Bret jumped up and pushed him down off the ring, then Jim came from behind and knocked Bret down. Jim and Bret exchanged blows for a while, then Owen AGAIN reappeared and got a hold of Bret and held against the ropes, Jim came charging at him Bret who moved out of the way at the last minute. Jim ran straight into Owen, and Bret got the pin.
I was hoping this match would have a little creativity in it, but it didn’t, same old same old. I think that they need to get Bret something different and the whole Owen v Bret thing is worn out.
Next match was the Undertaker vs. Yokozuna, I was out for a cig break again and missed the whole match but I know that Undie won. What is so exciting about the Undertaker, anyway??
That was it, nothing too exciting, nothing too new . . .
UWF BLACKJACK BRAWL 9/23/94 by DENNIS MILLER
WHAT YOU MISSED: Herb Abrams’ Universal Wrestling Federation is back! Abrams put on a three hour wrestling card at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas and here are the Results . . . DAN SPIVEY beat JOHNNY ACE, (with MISSY HYATT), to win the UWF America’s title when Hyatt turned on Ace . . . JACK ARMSTRONG beat MONDO GUERRO for the UWF junior championship . . . SUNNY BEACH beat DR. FEEL GOOD with Missy Hyatt in Feel Good’s corner . . . BOB ORTON JR. and HELL RAISER THOR fought to a double disqualification . . . LITTLE TOKYO beat THE KARATE KID for the world midget championship . . . SAMSON beat THE IRISH ASASSIN . . . TYLER MANE beat STEVE RAY for the MGM Grand championship . . . CANDY DEVINE beat TINA MORETTY for the UWF women’s championship . . . THE KILLER B’S beat THE NEW POWERS OF PAIN: THE WARLORD and THE POWER WARRIOR, to win the UWF tag team championship . . . This was the first really good match of the evening . . . CACTUS JACK and JIMMY SNUKA wrestled to a double disqualification in a lumberjack match . . . STEVE WILLIAMS, the UWF champion, beat SID VICIOUS by disqualification when Dan Spivey attacked Williams . . . Notes: I felt this was a very mediocre card, with the exception of the last three matches, the matches were average . . . There will be two more Blackjack Brawls in the future . . . Herb Abrams wasted no time in getting a 900 number and official UWF merchandise, probably left over from the old UWF . . . The announcing on this card, was absolutely horrible . . . The main announcer knew nothing about wrestling and the ring announcer kept mispronouncing names . . . We were constantly treated to Herb Abrams screaming about how wonderful the UWF is . . . Abrams does a good job of sounding exactly like Vince McMahon . . . It was nice to see wrestlers I haven’t seen in a while, Steve Williams, Dan Spivey and Johnny Ace, however, the UWF has a long way to go before it can compete with the major promotions . . .
WCW PRO WRESTLING 9/24/94 by RYAN CUNNINGHAM
WHAT YOU MISSED: THE HONKY TONK MAN beat LARRY SANTO . . . A special look at IWC Lucha Libre which will have a PPV deemed “When Worlds Collide!” on November 6th . . . STEVE AUSTIN over a prelim . . . Halloween Havoc Control Center: In addition to FLAIR vs. HH in a cage with MR. T as a special ref. THE HONKY TONK MAN takes on JOHNNY B. BADD, DUSTIN RHODES meets ARN ANDERSON, THE NASTY BOYS will face TERRY FUNK & BUNKHOUSE BUCK & MOHAMMAD ALI will present the belt to the winner of the World Championship match . . . TOM BURTON lost to ALEX WRIGHT . . . Gordon interviewed the HTM who said he had a “mean tune in his guitar” for JOHNNY B. BADD . . . FLASHBACK: Nov. 20, 1990 saw RIC FLAIR take on BUTCH REED at the CLASH (with JIM ROSS & PAUL E. DANGEROUSLY doing commentary!) . . . “HACKSAW” JIM DUGGAN vs. “LORD” STEVEN REGAL went to a time limit draw . . .
WWF MANIA 9/24/94 by BRYAN FISHER
WHAT YOU MISSED: THE UNDERTAKER killed TONY DIVITO . . . LEX LUGER beat a prelim . . . JIM “THE ANVIL” NIEDHART squashed a prelim . . . A replay of BOB BACKLUND killing that little dude . . . A replay of the DUKE “THE DUMPSTER” DROESE/JERRY LAWLER match . . . DIESEL & SHAWN MICHAELS beat 2 losers.
WWF SUPERSTARS OF WRESTLING 9/24/94 by RYAN CUNNINGHAM
WHAT YOU MISSED: THE BRITISH BULLDOG destroyed RENO RIGGINS . . . DIESEL & SHAWN MICHAELS beat ROD BELL & KEVIN KRUEGER . . . A replay of DINK being humiliated by JERRY LAWLER, then footage of how DOINK & DINK got back at him on RAW last week . . . DOINK over SONNY ROGERS, during the match LAWLER went to ringside & demolished DINK’S tricycle . . . A segment announcing the return of KING KONG BUNDY . . . GARY JACKSON fell to TATANKA . . . A replay of BOB BACKLUND putting the chicken wing on WWF Magazine writer LOUIE GIONFREDO from MNR . . . ADAM BOMB over BARRY HORROWITZ . . . A promo for some type of program called THE ZONE which will take place on October 23 (likely to compete with WCW’S Halloween Havoc on that same day) . . . A message from THE UNDERTAKER threatening YOKOZUNA . . . YOKO flattened GARY SCOTT, but was then frightened by THE UNDERTAKER’S music . . . NEXT WEEK: ABE “KNUCKLEBALL” SHWARTZ debuts . . . !
WWF WRESTLING CHALLENGE 9/24/94 by JEFF BROWN
WHAT YOU MISSED: Things started out as TED DIBIASE laughed and was saying how happy he was that BOB BACKLUND is finally seeing the light . . . To kick off the action, the Headshrinkers defeated TOM STONE and ROCK WARNER . . . Next up was the great Bob Backlund interview from RAW . . . ABE “KNUCKLEBALL” SHWARTZ (aka: Brooklyn Brawler) made his debut against GEORGE ANDERSON . . . Live Event News was next with Todd Pettingzoo . . . The reigning WWF intercontinental champion RAZOR RAMON was next as he pinned IKE ANDERSON . . . A KING KONG BUNDY promo was next . . . IRWIN R. SCHYSTER was led down the aisle by the million dollar man as he wrote BILLY JOE EATON off . . . GREAT highlights from when JERRY LAWLER popped Dink’s balloons . . . DUKE “THE DUMPSTER” DROESE, who for some reason is starting to be one of the few wrestlers I like, took RED TYLER out to the curb . . . After a few commercials, DOUBLE J performed a great match as he made GARY SCOTCH submit to the figure 4 . . . A WWF Zone commercial was next . . . THE UNDERTAKER had a few words to say to YOKOZUNA . . . THE HEAVENLY BODIES defeated TODD BAKER and BUTLER STRONG . . . Live Event News ended things . . . NEXT WEEK: 123 KID, JERRY LAWLER, YOKOZUNA, BUSHWACKERS,INT W/TATANKA, AND THE RETURN OF THE BRITISH BULLDOG . . .
WCW SATURDAY NIGHT 9/24/94 by RYAN CUNNINGHAM
WHAT YOU MISSED: JOHNNY B. BADD beat MARK STARR, Gene talked to BADD about facing THE HONKY TONK MAN at Halloween Havoc . . . TONY VINCENT lost to “HACKSAW” JIM DUGGAN, interview with DUGAN who challenged “LORD” STEVEN REGAL to a match . . . A Halloween Havoc update . . . ALEX WRIGHT over THE GAMBLER . . . Interview with THE SULLIVANS, Dave talked about that HH GUY and Kevin talked about putting CACTUS JACK out of WCW . . . STEVE AUSTIN beat FRANKIE LANCASTER, interview with AUSTIN complaining about how he lost the US Title . . . Gene said he’d be responding to some of MARK MADDEN’S comments on his hotline report . . . STARS & STRIPES defeated FRED AVERY & CHICK DONOVAN, interview with S & S which was interrupted by PRETTY WONDERFUL . . . THE HONKY TONK MAN pinned BARRY HOUSTON . . . Footage of a press conference in Detroit concerning Halloween Havoc, it featured the great MOHAMMAD ALI . . . Interview with FLAIR, who did his usual HH GUY bashing. This brought out DAVE SULLIVAN who, is a big HH GUY fan. FLAIR asked DAVE if he’d like to wrestle the “REAL” World Champion tomorrow night. KEVIN SULLIVAN came out to knock some sense into his brother. FLAIR gave him 30 minutes to apologize . . . Footage of COL. PARKER’S men attacking THE NASTY BOYS in the locker room after FALL BRAWL . . . ARN ANDERSON squashed JOEY MAGGS, interview with ANDERSON about facing DUSTIN RHODES at Halloween Havoc . . . THE GUARDIAN ANGEL defeated VADER by DQ when HARLEY RACE interfered, VADER then splashed & moonsaulted the GA . . . Interview with FLAIR & DAVE SULLIVAN, he accepted FLAIR’S challenge to wrestle on Sunday. KEVIN SULLIVAN came out & was furious at his brother slapping him around as usual . . .
WWF SPOTLIGHT 9/24/94 by CHRIS YETMAN
WHAT YOU MISSED: Clip of BOB BACKLUND snapping . . . RAZOR RAMON served up IKE ANDERSON . . . DAVEY BOY SMITH beat RINO RIGGINS in his first match back in the WWF . . . Live Event News with TED “NICE GUY” DIBIASE . . . DIESEL and SHAWN MICHAELS beat two Prelims w/the Jacknife . . . Replay of the DINK and JERRY “THE KING” LAWLER stuff . . . The Backlund interview when he snapped on “LITTLE” LOU GIANFREDDO . . . ADAM BOMBED defeated a prelim with a reverse crotch slam . . . A KING KONG BUNDY promo (He looks bigger then I thought he would be!) . . . I was watching the game so all I know is the THE HEAVELY BODIES beat their opponents . . . ABE SCHWARTZ defeated a fellow prelim in his debut . . .
WCW WORLD WIDE WRESTLING 8/7/94 by BRYAN FISHER
WHAT YOU MISSED: STARS AND STRIPES beat THE SOUTHERN POSSE. . . THE GARDIAN ANGEL beat TOM BURTON . . . GENE OKERLUND did a Havoc Control Center . . . FRANK ANDERSON beat TONY VINCENT with a back suplex/bridge thing . . . Comments from Ric Flair . . . JEAN PAUL LEVESQUE over CHRIS NELSON . . . Comments from the WCW Champ . . . THE ARMSTRONG BROTHERS fell to ARN ANDERSON and BUNKHOUSE BUCK. After the match Eric B. interviewed the Members of THE STUDD STABLE . . .
WWF ALL AMERICAN WRESTLING 9/25/94
WHAT YOU MISSED: a promo for KING KONG BUNDY . . . a replay of DAVEY BOY SMITH’S prelim match from WWF SUPERSTARS . . . a replay of TATANKA’S prelim match from WWF SUPERSTARS . . . a replay of BOB BACKLAND beating up a reporter from WWF MONDAY NIGHT RAW . . . RAZOR RAMON defeated IKE ANDERSON . . . RODDY PIPER ranked on SHAWN MICHAELS and DIESEL in his segment . . . the MEMORY LANE match featured a boring match from 1981 pitting MIL MASCARAS vs. JOSE ESTRADA, I fell asleep for the win . . . THE UNDERTAKER had a message for YOKOZUNA . . . and things ended with a replay of the YOKOZUNA prelim match from WWF SUPERSTARS . . .
USWA WRESTLING by CRUNGE 9/25/94
WHAT YOU MISSED: BRIAN CHRISTOPHER did unmask THE DARK PATRIOT at a house show, it was (gasp!) DOUG GILBERT, and now they have a hair vs. hair match coming up . . . ELIMINATORS beat EDRICK HINES and KORY WILLIAMS . . . SID VICIOUS came out to cheers, and was told his opponent, CHARLIE LAIRD (jobber), had left the building; Sid was pissed and stomped off . . . DOUG BASHAM and TONY WILLIAMS lost to the PHANTOMS (wait, the Phantoms cheated! Can you believe it?) . . . FANTASIA talked about PG-13 . . . EDDIE GIVENS came out to fight DOUG GILBERT, but SID ran in and beat the stuffing out of him . . . Sid then challenged anyone to face him, and out came the ELIMINATORS (face turn, no reason); Sid coaxed them towards the ring, when the SPELLBINDER attacked the ELIMINATORS from behind, and Sid and Spellbinder beat up the Eliminators for a while . . . clips of the DOUG GILBERT/BRIAN CHRISTOPHER feud . . . Christopher came out to whine about Gilbert, SCOTT BOWDEN came out, Christopher hit him, and TOMMY RICH and DOUG GILBERT jumped Christopher and started cutting his hair; JERRY LAWLER made the save (Jerry, where were you when Sid was looking for someone?) . . . a commercial for Piano by Candlelight, something I’m sure many USWA fans ordered; if I was the pres. of that company, I’d fire the head of marketing . . . the SHADOW lost to one of the MOONDOGS . . . BUDDY LANDEL and TOMMY RICH talked about an upcoming match with the MOONDOGS where the losing team must split up . . . Landel and Rich then took on PG-13; the most interesting part was when one of the bottom turnbuckles failed and the bottom rope was lost; Rich used a chain while the ref. was distracted and pinned Wolfie D . . .
WCW MAIN EVENT 9/25/94
WHAT YOU MISSED: a recap of NAVILLUS EVAD challenging RIC FLIAR from WCW SATURDAY NIGHT . . . THE HONKY TONK MAN over MIKE WINNER, followed by the usual Honky interview . . . a promo for THAT HH GUY’S phone line . . . That HH Guy had JIMMY “THE LEACH” HART & “HOMELESS” BRUTIS BEEFCAKE with him during an interview that saw evaD come out to ask for HH’s autograph. HH autographed a picture then gave evaD a pair of boots that he said he wore when he defeated the late ANDRE THE GIANT . . . STARS & STRIPES became the new WCW WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS by defeating PRETTY WONDERFUL when THE PATRIOT pinned PAUL ROMA (the planted models in the crowd *LOVED* this match) . . . JIM DUGAN over FRANK LANCASTER . . . and RIC FLAIR defeated navilluS evaD by DQ when that HH Guy entered the ring. Flair’s masked friend attempted to club HH from the top rope but was knocked away by Beefcake . . . After Flair left the ring, NAVILLUS NIVEK came down and berated evaD, tearing the autographed picture up in the process. That HH Guy came to his aid and things ended with HH claiming that one day evaD would defeat niveK much like he would defeat Ric Flair . . .
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Brownie’s Cake by JEFF BROWN
As I sit here watching Monday Night Raw and writing on my new laptop computer, I start thinking about the WCW and how I actually started to follow it. I was one of those guys who bought BASH knowing none of the matches but the HH/Ric Flair match and I can’t stand the HHster.
I ordered it and have been following the WCW ever since. I got to thinking about how much I love the WWF even though I think it is all a circus. As I watched the title matches, I think about how bad the title contentions have been in the WWF but let me put down the WCW for a sec, who the heck wants to pay $25.00 every two months to see the same title matches with the same guys? I know that I don’t.
Things have gone way too far in the WWF with the clown stuff. They start a feud when some little shrimp gets balloons popped? Ah Vinnie, you wonder why tickets aren’t selling. Face facts, I have been to a few house shows in the past months and the only people that work hard out there are the 123 Kid, Kwang, and the Hitman Bret Hart. Shawn Michaels and Razor Ramon’s matches are always full of action but you pay Lex Luger some dough and all we see are rest holds and his stupid poses? Give me a break!
If I was only getting paid $500 a night (and the wrestlers get a lot more), I would not only travel, but I would wrestle my heart out (I love to wrestle). Get rid of these guys who think they are too great, that they do not have to put on a good show. Nobody wants to spend $15-$25 on a ticket to something where they are going to be board at.
I have wondered about Vinnie’s mind. We watch RAW and get to see some great action and even some title matches, heck sometimes we can even see titles change hands. But when you spend $25.00 or so on a PPV, you get cheated because you don’t see titles change hands and if you do, probably only one title changes hands. I would assume they make more money with the PPV’S, and not the free broadcasts, so it doesn’t make sense that he rips us off with boring PPVS.
If the Vince were On-Line and he could see how we reacted to the past few PPVs, maybe we would see a change in the WWF. He’d see what we expect from them and maybe, just maybe, he’d do something about it. Well, who am I kidding — Vinnie listen to the fans? That’d only happen though a 1-900 number at $2.95 for the first minute, $.95 for every minute thereafter . . .
FROM THE MIND OF THE MANIAC by “Maniac” Mike Blade
The column that I was going to write this week is on hold. Why? Because That HH Guy has once again done the unthinkable. He’s signed on for what is reportedly a five-year stint with WCW.
Now I’m all in favor of the American way, apple pie, hot dogs and all that. I fully believe in an honest day’s work for an honest day’s pay. But let’s be honest, HH hasn’t given wrestling an honest day’s work since around WrestleMania IV. He was the first of the cartoon characters in the squared circle. There wasn’t a foe that couldn’t be defeated with a ripped T-shirt and cupping a hand to an ear. Flex for the fools and they’ll buy into the training, the prayers, the vitamins, etc., etc., yawn, yawn.
Back in my days as a mark, I realized what HH was doing. I knew that I was being manipulated. I knew that he looked down on me from his lofty perch and felt I was just so much trash. But there was no denying the man’s charisma. For all his faults, HH is the most charismatic wrestler in history. More so than Randy Savage. More so than Ric Flair. More so than Roddy Piper.
A decade ago, it was fun. It was even funny. HH would find a new foe — be it Piper or King Kong Bundy, the Iron Sheik or Big John Stud — and he would vanquish each one to make the world safe for the merchandising of yellow T-shirts and pay-per-views.
A decade later it’s been there, seen that, done it. HH is old news. Yes, he can still get a crowd of marks going like nobody’s business, but he has more detractors than ever, and there will be more. He’s brought it on himself.
Hulkamania died at his own hands because he just refused to go away. Sure, if Ted Turner offered me a few million bucks, I’d jump into the ring too but he’s kidding himself if he truly believes that everyone is just waiting to see him.
Yet, he deserves our thanks. That’s right, if you ever see HH in person. Walk over, shake his hand and say “Thanks Terry.” It was HH, along with Vince McMahon, that put wrestling on the cover of Sports Illustrated. They brought wrestling back to network television for the first time in twenty years and they originated, they innovated, and they carried the sport through the decade that killed Roller Derby.
Today the difference is that McMahon decided to keep going, to keep pushing for more. HH decided he could kick back and roll along. Why work when you can play. You’ve played the script a hundred times. Play it again, HHster.
HH needs to be thanked for opening our eyes. Many of us might still be marks today had HH not insulted our intelligence one too many times. His work brought wrestling to it’s pinnacle and made smarts out of whole generations of fans. Let’s hope he decides to start earning his day’s pay again, or else he might as well leave before he drags wrestling down again.
NOTES FROM THE MAD DOG
For the first time in 8 years, I didn’t watch more than 5 minutes of the WCW’S Saturday Night this week. Maybe it was the fact that the Washington Huskies were beating the crap out of Miami, maybe it was that I’ve found the USWA on a UHF at the same time as WCW, or the fact that my mind was on that special girl I met this week, I didn’t watch WCW.
This may not mean much to you and I know it doesn’t mean much to the WCW, but I think I’m about ready to give up on them. Honestly, I’m bored with the second comings and former big names doing jobs for idiots like the Honky Tonk Man and Jim Dugan. It’s hard to even think of but I’m on the verge of giving up.
Saturday Nights used to be special to me, it used to be that I could tune into WTBS and see some quality WRESTLING in an atmosphere I could relate to. After all the glitz and the cartoons from the WWF’s shows, I could sit back and be mesmerized by the images coming out of a tiny studio with a tiny crowd and a “big time wrestling” mentality.
It was honest, if you can say such a thing about wrestling. No one tried to beat an image of a washed up blonde guy down your throat every ten seconds (call the HH Hotline — $923424 the first minute, your mortal soul all time after that . . .), there were no plants of local models in the crowds, the ring didn’t rotate, and by god, it wasn’t the WWF. That’s why I loved it so much.
Right now I envy anyone who has access to JOE PEDICINO’S TV Wrestling Block. While he does show an hour of the WWF, he’s supplementing it with shows from Smoky Mountain, the USWA and the NGWA (soon to be adding an hour of the new NWA show) — all leagues that feature the style of wrestling that I can relate to. If I had access to that block each week — I’d probably never go back to WCW on Saturday Nights.
Hey WCW, if you’re listening, you’re losing me. I used to defend you until the ends of the earth but you’ve changed and now I’m bitter. I gave you my Saturday Nights for 8 years now and I’m about to start watching the Simpsons on FOX to supplement the USWA wrestling I’ve found during the time slot I used to devote to you.
What? You’re making money? You’ve got all these big names and you really really really want me to pay $2343242342 for your PPVS where you’re going to give these guys your titles? Give you another chance to show that you’re really hip and touching on what I really want to see?
Sorry, missed what you were saying, I flipped off my TV.
HAVE A GREAT WEEK,
MADDOGJMF & Company!
HOW TO CONTACT THE RING REPORT:
“MAD DOG” JAMES M. FINCH, Editor in Chief: MADDOGJMF@AOL.COM and 71554,121 on CSERVE
JEFF BROWN, IWCCW Reporter, WWF Wrestling Challenge, Rumors & Word Search: CARD NEWS@AOL.COM
RYAN CUNNINGHAM, WCW PRO & SAT NITE, WCW PPV, WWF SUPESTARS & This week in History Reporter: PATTERN99@AOL.COM
BRYAN FISHER, WWF RAW, WWF MANIA & WCW WORLD WIDE Reporter: BUCKBUNDY1@AOL.COM
DENNIS MILLER, ECW & SMW Reporter: 73633,1651 on CSERVE
“CRUNGE” CRAIG UTLEY, USWA Reporter: firstname.lastname@example.org
TAMERA00, Fashion Correspondent & WWF in Sacramento Reporter: Tamera00@aol.com
CHRIS YETMAN, WWF Spotlight Reporter: Chryetman@aol.com
“Maniac” Mike BLADE, From the Mind of the Maniac columnist: Maniac1@aol.com
DAVID TAUB, IWCCW & WWF in San Jose Reporter: email@example.com