The Ring Report TV Update 3/31/95 Vol. 1, No. 109

The Ring Report TV Update 3/31/95 Vol. 1, No. 109
(“Better late than dead.  Or is it?”)
WWF NEWS: As most of you probably know by now, BIG JOHN STUDD died earlier last week of Hodgkin’s disease. Studd was 46 and he was best remembered for classic feuds with Andre the Giant and THAT HH GUY . . . WrestleMania XI will cost $34.95, the most money ever charged for a wrestling PPV . . . BOB BACKLUND and RAZOR RAMON will be feuding after WrestleMania . . . ERIK WATTS and CHAD FORTUNE beat THE HEAVENLY BODIES in Madison Square Garden . . . THE 123 KID suffered his second concussion in ten days while wrestling HAKUSHI. It is hard to communicate with Hakushi in the ring because he speaks no English . . . The WWF will have some lower priced two hour PPV’S this year bringing their total up to nine. The PPV’S will basically be like Saturday Night Main Event used to be and will be use d to set up angles for the Major PPV’S like King of the Ring and SummerSlam. Next year, the WWF is planning a PPV per month . . . CRUSH was busted in Hawaii for allegedly receiving steroids through the mail and for having several unregistered guns in his house. He is out on ten thousand dollars bail . . . The WWF really wants CHRIS BENOIT. If they are able to land him for WrestleMania, Bennoit and OWEN HART will get the Tag straps . . . MEN ON A MISSION have been suspended, but no one seems to know why . . .

WCW NEWS: From top to bottom, WCW Uncensored was the worst PPV in the history of wrestling. It is the last WCW PPV I will ever see. Not only was the show a disaster and not only was it more expensive the other PPV’S, it was also very short, ending almost thirty minutes before most PPV’S . . . WCW is apparently sticking to its firing of DUSTIN RHODES, BLACKTOP BULLY and MIKE GRAHAM . . . RANDY SAVAGE wants to have the same short of power HH has . . . HH and RIC FLAIR are locked in a bitter battle over the direction of WCW . . . Flair wants to reunite THE FOUR HORSEMEN and have them feud with THE ROAD WARRIORS, while HH wants to relive the WARRIOR/ANDRE/SAVAGE/HH angles with RENEGADE playing the Warrior part and PAUL WRIGHT playing the Andre part and HH and Savage reprising their roles . . . Paul Wright, an Andre The Giant clone, should be in WCW in time for Slamboree . . . WCW would like to get CURT HENNIG to be a member of the Four Horsemen, but it is unlikely they can afford him . . . The UFC style PPV scheduled for June has apparently been scrapped in favor of a regular PPV on June 18 . . . GENE OKERLUND is recovering well after a kidney transplant, which is why he was missing from Uncensored . . . MENG will be getting a big push as a future opponent for HH. The WCW would also like to get Meng into an upcoming Ultimate Fighting Championship . . . PAUL ROMA has been fired from WCW . . . TBS has moved WCW from the entertainment division to the sports division . . .

WCW Prime Wrestling 3/20/95 by DAVID TAUB
WHAT YOU MISSED: First 15 minutes edited for your protection . . . BOBBY EATON actual won a match, defeating SCOTT ARMSTRONG . . . “STUNNING” STEVE AUSTIN won in a squash . . . A replay of BUTCHER/KEVIN SULLIVAN defeating HACKSAW DUGGAN/NAVILLUS EVAD by DQ when Hacksaw used the board on Butcher (which the camera conveniently missed) . . . Things closed out with STING & RANDY SAVAGE defeating BIG BUBBA ROGERS & AVALANCHE . . .

For the third week in a row, I took a 90-mile drive to Louisville for some USWA “action”.  The card on 3/7 was a fun and great card to watch.  Last week’s was horrible but tonight’s card was better but they could still deliver better action than they did. Louisville cards are held every Tuesday night and for the most part, the main events are the same that were in Memphis the week before and usually with the same result.

As usual with the smaller promotions, a souvenir table is always set up and for the past 3 weeks, The Moondogs (Spot and Rex) are always there to try and make that extra money.  I enjoy watching the Moondogs but not enough to get my picture taken with them or anything.  I’m not a star struck type of person, so I wouldn’t have my picture taken with anyone or pay for anyone’s autograph.

Now on to tonight’s card which had 4 no-shows.  No-shows?? Remember when that used to be one of our main gripes about WCW??

Basham is the person you need to see if you want to participate in the USWA Wrestling School run by Danny Davis.  They billed Basham from Louisville.  Jack Hammer has a Road Warrior type gimmick but is horrible and if he wants to get to the big buck leagues, he better find a new gimmick.  Hammer is managed by Rev. Diamond Mike who is a clone of Sir Oliver Humperdinck.  The only difference is he enters the ring with a tropical drink.  Diamond Mike is not bad and could probably make it elsewhere but being a clone of Humperdinck may hold him back. No need to describe this match.  It was boring, boring, boring with Hammer getting the squash win.  BTW, Hammer was to wrestle former WCW jobber, Scott Stud.  Stud did make an appearance later that night so he must have been running late. Maybe he had some exams to take at Georgia Tech too. <G>

Canyon has a hockey player gimmick.  Last week he came out with a hockey stick.  Tonight he came out with a copy of the Stanley Cup, and lo and behold, it was not used as a weapon.  I guess there is a possibility that he did play with the IHL in season’s past but I don’t feel like looking up my IHL stats.  Gorgeous George is obviously not related to the original Gorgeous George.  He is billed as his grandson.  When I first saw him on TV, I didn’t like him but after seeing him on past weeks team with Tommy Rich and then Doug Gilbert, he has made a small impression with me.  He is billed from Hollywood but he has a British accent, so whatever. His catch-phrase is “Ooh La La”.  Gorgeous is normally managed by Big Business Brown but he was another no-show and could very well be gone from the USWA now from what happened later tonight.  Another boring squash match that Gorgeous George III won.

Intermission time and once again The Moondogs arrive at the souvenir stand along with Chris Canyon.

Jack Hammer replaced no-show Big Daddy Cyrus (Lanny Kean/Moondog Cujo/Cousin Junior). Since I can’t stand Hammer, I was disappointed Cyrus wasn’t there. Since Cyrus is a veteran and used to be a Moondog, he knows how to work a good match with the Moondogs. Once again The Moondogs were accompanied by Miss Texas who, as always, gets the first big pop of the night. The Moondogs, as usual, entered the ring with their choice of weapons.  This time Spot brought out a mailbox which I have never seen before. There were no special stipulations for this match.  I mention that for one reason.  Most of the Moondog matches have no stipulations but they continue to use their weapons on their opponents and vice-versa and there is never a disqualification and this has gone on forever, as in since the days when The Moondogs first made their return to Memphis and feuded with Jerry Lawler and Jeff Jarrett. This was done Texas Tornado style but not a Tornado match, as mentioned.  The crowd would always pop when Miss Texas would slug Rev. Diamond Mike.  Last week’s Moondog match against Cyrus and Bones was boring.  This was much, much better with the Moondogs getting the victory. Another post-Moondog ritual is for them to threaten/chase the ring announcer who does a great job in Louisville.  I wish I could remember his name but he is also very popular, but not in the sickening way David Manning, as a ref., was with World Class.

Drifter replaced no-show Reggie B. Fine. Spellbinder is very impressive looking and I can’t believe Vince hasn’t decided to use this guy yet. I have no idea who this Drifter guy was but this was another squash won by Spellbinder.  So far, 4 matches and 3 duds.

It was time to take a brief time-out to prepare for the next match. They had to remove the top two ring ropes for the DOUBLE BULLWHIP MATCH.

Both entered with the bullwhips and did their necessary cracking of the whips so we would know they were the real things. Dundee easily proved he knew how to use the whip better thanks to his experience years ago when feuding with Dutch Mantel. Very good match regardless of the gimmick. Dundee got the first crack in on Christopher who did his best to avoid another whipping. This feud has gone on for a few months now but both are still considered faces and it does seem the fans are evenly split on who to root for and Brian and Bill know who is on their side. That must be the advantage of wrestling in the same cities every week. Everyone is like one big family in the USWA.

The first person to have his feet touch the floor loses the match, thus the need to remove the top two ring ropes. Of course, the handle of the whips were used as weapons and the two battled back and forth while doing the whip thing. At one point, Christopher lost his bullwhip and Dundee picked it up and briefly used both on Brian before throwing one of the whips to Brian so he would have a weapon once again. Dundee then offered his hand but Brian attacked him and the battle resumed. Eventually the two maneuvered themselves towards the edge of the ring and it was time to knock someone out of the ring. Brian’s feet touched first and Bill Dundee was declared the winner. The last two weeks they had a post-match brawl but not tonight. Good match and I guess this feud will continue until they finally schedule a loser leaves town match which I predict will have Jerry Lawler as referee.  Maybe after that match they will publicly admit that Brian is Lawler’s son. Brian is the more popular of the two and had the second biggest pop of the night.

Intermission time so they could re-attach the ring ropes and set up the cage.  Hmmm . . . guess who came out to the souvenir tables again??  Woof, woof, you’re right.  By the way, USWA, at least in Louisville, has the worst programs known to mankind and for the last two weeks they have used old programs.  Yes, I complain about them but I need to buy one each week since I have no idea what the card is.  Well, maybe I shouldn’t complain. On the Smoky Mountain cards in Erlanger, KY, they don’t even sell programs at their souvenir tables. It took them forever to re-attach the ring ropes since they were tangled up but they still finished before the cage was done. If you have never seen a USWA cage match, the cage is not on the ring apron but on the floor.  This allows them to take their battles to the floor and can whip each other into the cage. The purpose of the cage is just to keep anyone from entering the cage to interfere.

This was for the USWA tag team titles vs. PG-13 (JC Ice and Wolfie D), leaving Louisville for 5 years. As usual, they had the same stipulations last week in Memphis and I already knew PG-13 regained the titles so I knew that would be the result tonight, and it was. PG-13 were accompanied by Mama D and she sat outside of the cage with the ring announcer who had the key to the cage. PG-13 probably had the biggest pop of anyone tonight and even though they are small in stature, they are a very good team as are Rich and Gilbert. Tommy Rich is a great heel, something WCW didn’t know how to take advantage of. Once again it was hard for me to watch Doug Gilbert because when I see him, I just think of Eddie Gilbert.

Another good match even with knowing the outcome ahead of time. All four did a great job and utilized the cage as much as possible. Of the four, Tommy Rich was the only one who didn’t bleed, which is saying a lot since Rich used to bleed constantly while with Georgia Championship Wrestling in the early eighties. The climax of the match was when Gorgeous George III ran to ringside to get the key so he could enter the cage. He wound up hitting Mama D which brought Papa D out of his ringside seat to attack the Gorgeous one. The fans in Louisville had not seen Papa D on TV yet so they did not who it was. Papa D looks like he may be a veteran wrestler but I didn’t recognize him from where I was sitting.  With all this confusion and people throwing weapons over the cage and into the ring, PG-13 got their pinfall and the win. Gorgeous continued to battle with Papa D and Crusher Bones, Jack Hammer, Rev. Diamond Mike, Scott Stud, and Chris Canyon all came out to do one of those weekly Memphis brawls. By the way, USWA can only afford to break one table so are behind the ECW in that category, but Rich did piledrive JC Ice on the table and broke it as expected. Back to the brawl, the others finally entered the cage and when all was said and done, the heels retreated and JC Ice was laying as if injured and a stretcher was brought out.  I didn’t take his injury seriously since his father (Bill Dundee), did not come out to check on him. The USWA fans have known for years that Jamie and Bill are father and son since JC Ice originally wrestled as Jamie Dundee.

They didn’t do anything tonight to reveal what any of the matches will be next week but my guess is PG-13 and Papa D vs. Rich, Gilbert and Gorgeous and another Christopher vs. Dundee with another stipulation. 3 duds and 3 good matches to me make for a good evening, and it was.

WHAT YOU MISSED: RAZOR RAMON pinned HENRY GODWIN . . . VINCE MCMAHON bought out STEVE MCMICHAELS to do color . . . KING KONG BUNDY squashed 2 losers . . . KAMA yelled at MCMICHAELS witch turned into a brawl . . . Toad did a WM report . . . and in the main event, THE SMOKING GUNNS pinned THE HEAVENLY BODIES . . .

WHAT YOU MISSED: BUDDY LANDELL beat THE WOLF MAN . . . An interview with THE DIRTY WHITE BOY . . . BOB ARMSTRONG and TRACY SMOTHERS’ mystery partner against THE GANGSTAS will be THE UNDERTAKER . . .  An interview with JIM CORNETTE and Tracy Smothers . . .  A video and comments from the Undertaker and PAUL BEARER . . .  Bobby Blaze beat a prelim . . . Another look at BOBBY BLAZE becoming SMW champion . . . An interview with Bobby Blaze, which is interrupted by BUDDY LANDELL, who offers Blaze $500 to give him the SMW title. Blaze refuses, and challenges Landell to a match which will take place next week . . . An interview with the Gangstas who introduce KILLER KYLE as their partner against Smothers, Armstrong and the Undertaker on April 7 . . . An interview with BOO BRADLEY . . .  AL SNOW and UNABOMB killed two guys . . . Boo Bradley beat Killer Kyle by disqualification when the Gangstas attacked Bradley . . . An interview with THE ROCK ‘N’ ROLL EXPRESS ended the show . . .

WHAT YOU MISSED: I taped this show and watched it at 5:05 Central Time Saturday Night, which is when I used to watch WCW . . . The show opened with some unintelligible comments from RON SIMMONS who then beat HACK MYERS . . . Following the match, Simmons proved that just because you graduate from  college, that doesn’t mean you’re intelligent when he called out 911 . . . Simmons and 911 had an impromptu match which probably had Simmons wondering where Ice Train was . . . Comments from TERRY FUNK . . .  On April 8: THE ROTTEN BROTHERS meet in a hair vs. hair match . . . Other matches are: SHANE DOUGLAS vs. THE SANDMAN, THE PUBLIC ENEMY, SABU and TAZMANIAC, and DEAN MALENKO and CHRIS BENOIT meet in a three way tag match . . . Also on April 8, TOO COLD SCORPIO defends the ECW TV championship against EDDIE GUERRO . . . Then on April 15, CACTUS JACK and Terry Funk will finally meet one on one on American soil . . .  More comments from Terry Funk, who says he wants to castrate Cactus Jack . . . A promo for Golf Magazine, which I’m sure every good ECW fan reads . . .  Comments from Cactus Jack . . . Too Cold Scorpio beat Dean Malenko for the ECW TV title in a very good match . . .  Comments from the Public Enemy in which they make fun of WCW and RIC FLAIR . . .

The National Wrestling League is the promotion of Dick Caricofe of Hagerstown, Maryland.  He runs cards in western Maryland, neighboring regions in Pennsylvania and West Virginia, and also occasionally in Guam and other areas of the South Pacific. I do occasional time keeping for this group, although I don’t ever expect to be taken to Guam or Tahiti.

I accompanied Referee Howard Goldman and all-purpose Man Andy Vineberg to the NWL cards Friday in Pennsylvania and Saturday in West Virginia. Thank God Howard drives up. I got four sets of papers graded while riding in the front seat of his car on the way to McConnellsburg on Friday..

Here are the results of Friday night’s card at McConnellsburg High School in beautiful downtown McConnellsburg, Pa.  This was the card originally scheduled for the “cow palace” at Boonsboro, Md., but was moved to the Land Of No Athletic Commission To Speak Of.

0)  I got my last set of papers graded at the timekeeper’s table before the start of the first match.  I can spend a hassle-free rest-of-weekend.

1)  Stevie Hendrickson pinned Sid Sinister in 5:41

2)  Doink the Clown (not anyone you would have ever heard of as having played the role), pinned Adorable Adrian Hall three separate times.  After the first two pins (51 and 49 seconds, respectively), Hall asked promoter Caricofe for a 5-minute extension, which was granted. Doink won the last fall in 4:51 (and a long 4:51 at that — I should know!).

3)  Shane Shadows won a Battle Royal in 9:04.  The name of the last person he threw over the ropes is still known neither to me, nor to the ring announcer, nor to  Dick Caricofe. By winning the Battle Royal, Shane Shadows earned the right to wrestle Neil “the Power” Superior at the Saturday night card in WV.

4)  Morgus the Maniac (accompanied by his usual attendants in the white coats) pinned Johnny Polo (the name Scotty went by tonight, accompanied by manager Royce Prophet) in 10:02, in a match that went all over the gym.  It’s nice to work these cards outside the jurisdiction of the Maryland State Athletic Commission.

5)  Luna Vachon pinned Malia Hosaka in 9:43. Good ladies match. I had never seen Hosaka wrestle before, and she impressed me.

6)  The Bushwackers (both Luke and Butch this time), pinned the Goodfellas (Dino Casanova and Romeo Valentino, managed by Royce Prophet) in 9:02.  I was disappointed in that Royce escaped both matches without having been pantsed.

NOTE:  Jim Neidhart, Mr. Ebony and a couple of midgets were no-shows tonight

WHAT YOU MISSED: FLYIN’ BRIAN beat MORGUS WATSON . . . A look back at RIC FLAIR & VADER beating up on EVAD NAVILLUS on WCW Saturday Night . . . BARRY HOUSTON did the job for SGT. CRAIG PITTMAN . . . THE NASTY BOYS over FRED AVERY & GEORGE SOUTH . . . A replay of the alliance formed between BOBBY EATON & “LORD” STEVEN REGAL . . . “STUNNING” STEVE AUSTIN returned to defeat LARRY MACMAHON with a piledriver . . . And the dreaded main event saw “HACKSAW” JIM DUGGAN & STARS & STRIPES defeat the THREE FACES OF FEAR . . .

WHAT YOU MISSED: THE SMOKING GUNNS over THE HEAVENLY BODIES . . . LEX LUGER beat KING KONG BUNDY by DQ when TATANKA came in . . . A look at STEVE MCMICHAELS and KAMA brawling . . . RAZOR RAMON pinned HENRY GODWIN . . . and things ended with a tribute to BIG JOHN STUDD . . .

WHAT YOU MISSED: Things began with WCW Commish NICK BOCKWINKLE telling us that he has stripped VADER of the US Title because fines do not seem to bother him . . . SGT. CRAIG PITTMAN squashed MIKE DAVIS . . . STARS & STRIPES beat THE SOUTHERN POSSE . . . BIG BUBBA ROGERS over MARK STARR, BUBBA gave an interview . . . Gene O’s hotline gimmick this week was that 3 big superstars are headed for the company . . . FLYIN’ BRIAN downed THE TERRORIST . . . A segment showing THAT HH GUY & THE MACHO MAN pleading to NICK BOCKWINKLE to reinstate RIC FLAIR so they can get their hands on him.  BOCKWINKLE said their would be a vote by the executive board next week to determine FLAIR’S future . . . MENG destroyed MIKE KHOREY, the COL. gave an interview in which he warned THAT HH GUY . . . A segment showing “LORD” STEVEN REGAL dining with BOBBY EATON in London (more like MGM Studios).  EATON blew his nose in the dinner napkin . . . KEN KENDALL fell to STEVE AUSTIN, AUSTIN told Tony he’d like to regain his US Title . . . STING defeated LIEUT. JAMES EARL WRIGHT, then STING talked about BIG BUBBA . . . NIVEK NAVILLUS & REHCTUB beat two jobbers, NIVEK told Gene that he & REHCTUB are back on track . . . ARN ANDERSON over JOHN CRYSTAL, AA gave an interview . . . The main event saw THE MACHO MAN defeat AVALANCHE despite interference by the Faces of Fear . . . Things ended with words from STING & “MACHO MAN” RANDY SAVAGE . . .

MTW House Show 3/25/95 by RICKY KAYE
WHAT YOU MISSED: SCOTT D’AMORE pinned MASKED PATRIOT after a splash from the top rope . . . JOHNNY PARADISE & “CRIPPLER” RAY ROBERTS (subbing for SEAN CASEY), beat MACHINE GUNN KELLY & PUNISHER ROCK STEVENS . . . MOHAMMED JIHAD SAID(SP) beat MICKEY DOYLE by forfeit because Doyle was injured. Said’s former partner CHRIS CARTER came down and started to injure Doyle more and Said came to Doyle’s rescue . . . “Crippler” Ray Roberts and JUDGE DREAD battled to a double DQ in a real short match . . . LOS RUDOS beat STEVE NIXON & ANDY FISH when Fish could not continue. This lead to Sean Casey & Steve Nixon beating Los Rudos . . . AL SNOW pinned TOO COLD SCORPIO by reversing his power bomb in a match to see who the number one contender in MTW is . . . In the main event BRUISER BEDLAM upset CACTUS JACK when he pinned him in a great match after a DDT on a steel chair . . . This in my opinion was the best MTW show ever . . .

NWL at Potomac State College 3/26/95 by JEFF AMDUR
The Saturday night crowd at Potomac State College was much more “alive” than last night’s crowd at McConnelsburg.  An honest-to- goodness celebrity was in attendance, Potomac State’s most famous graduate, the man whose #4 baseball jersey hangs from the wall of this building, none other than John Kruk, all-star first baseman of the Philadelphia Phillies.  There was one thing that impressed me about these Potomocans.  If in Baltimore we ever had Cal Ripken or Brady Anderson show up at one of our MEWF cards, all hell would break loose.  Here, the locals respected Kruk’s privacy and let him sit with his family in the back row of the bleachers to be heckled by Shane Shadows and Don Julio Sanchez.

I did speak briefly to Kruk during intermission. I told him I wished he played for the Orioles. I wished him good luck for the forthcoming (?), baseball season except when he bats against my former student Denny Neagle of the Pirates.

Anyway, here’s what happened.

1)  Dirty Doug Deeds pinned Switchblade in 6:57.

2)  Giant T. Rantula pinned Johnny Eaton in 4:27.  T. Rantula is a big 340-pounder who goes about 6’8″.  He’s apparently been wrestling in Pittsburgh and Columbus for years.

3)  Doink the Clown (with help from a second Doink, neither Doink being anyone you would have ever heard of), pinned “Adorable” Adrian Hall in 11:05.

4)  Neil “the Power” Superior and (Keyser’s own), Jeremy Sumner pinned Shane Shadows and Don Julio Sanchez in 12:42.  Stipulation of this no DQ match was that if his team won, Shadows would win Superior’s NWL heavyweight championship match.  During the match Adrian Hall came out and handcuffed Neil to the ring post. The S-team then beat the living h3ll out of local hero Sumner, a recent graduate of Neil Superior’s wrestling school. At the end, however, Dirty Doug Deeds saved the day by cutting the cuffs off Neil and allowing Neil to pin Shadows.  Unbelievable crowd heat in this one.

5)  Johnny Polo (with a big assist from manager Royce Prophet), avenged his previous night’s loss to Morgus the Maniac by pinning His Maniacality (Maniacness?  Maniacity?)  in 11:58.

6)  Luna Vachon pinned Malia Hosaka in 9:22 as the ref. didn’t see Luna’s feet on the ropes for leverage. I couldn’t say anything because the ref. after all was my ride back to the Baltimore area.

7)  Morgus the Maniac won a 10-man battle royal in 6:57. He threw out Adorable Adrian Hall for the win.

8)  Bushwackers Luke Williams & Butch Miller once again pinned Goodfellas Romeo Valentino & Dino Casanova in 14:51.  Once again, manager Royce Prophet survived an evening without getting pantsed.

NWL’s last card of the season will be April 22 at Clear Spring High School in Clear Spring, Md.  I guess that’s somewhere near Hagerstown.  Dick Caricofe announced that he was trying to get the Rock & Roll Express, among others, to be on this card.

WHAT YOU MISSED: JOHNNY B. BADD over a ham and Egger . . .  A look at VADER killing EVAD on WCWSN . . . Vader killed a loser . . . ALEX WRIGHT danced on BUDDY WAYNE . . . A look at the EATON/REGAL confrontation . . .  BUNKHOUSE BUCK over a poor loser . . . PRETTY WONDERFUL pinned THE FANTASTICS . . .

WHAT YOU MISSED: MEN ON A MISSION defeated GARY SABAUGH and KEN REAPER; after the match MABLE took the microphone and called out THE SMOKING GUNNS in order to apologize for MOM’S attack on them following a match a couple of weeks back.  The Gunns came out, all four men shook hands, then, on cue, MO & MABLE raised BILLY & BART’S hands and delivered devastating clotheslines.  They followed it up by destroying the Gunns and then turning on OSCAR, their own manager . . . OWEN HART defeated a prelim . . . ADAM BOMB fell to SHAWN MICHAELS after a Michaels superkick . . . a WRESTLEMANIA Report . . . MAN MOUNTAIN ROCK over a prelim . . . and things ended with RAZOR RAMON over a prelim . . .

WHAT YOU MISSED: TOMMY RICH, DOUG GILBERT, GORGEOUS GEORGE III, and BIG BUSINESS BROWN came out; Rich and Gilbert have lost the tag belts to PG-13, but one of them gave JC ICE a piledriver through a table (we did not see a clip, but just heard about it) . . . Rich/Gilbert used a chain to beat REGGIE B. FINE / SCOTT STUDD . . . WOLFIE D. came out with the belts, talked about JC’S injury, then beat EDRICK HINES; after the match, Rich and Gilbert jumped him, and then a large man jumped in to help, then GGIII came in, then MABEL came to help; Wolfie D revealed the large man as his dad, PAPA D . . . BILL DUNDEE came out to talk about two upcoming matches in the same night; a lottery match, where the name will be chosen at ringside and he will wrestle that person for the belt, and a 4-pole match against BRIAN CHRISTOPHER, where there will be four poles, each with a box; two are empty, one has a chain, and one has a bullwhip . . . JACK HAMMER and SWEET GEORGIA BROWN w/DIAMOND MIKE lost to BILL DUNDEE and MISS TEXAS in a mixed-tag match . . . a BRIAN CHRISTOPHER video . . . Christopher came out, insulted Dundee, and Dundee came out, and Christopher attacked him (heel turn in the works?) . . . Christopher went to the ring to battle GGIII, but the show ran out while the two were still fighting . . . (author’s note: In the last 3-4 weeks, production has gotten sloppy. There is no excuse for having a match going when you leave the show.  In addition, they keep talking about things we’ve “just seen,” but we didn’t see them. I guess they figure that with the new set, we won’t notice the flow doesn’t work.)

Jeff the MEWF timekeeper, in the absence of Dark Cheetah, presents the results of the March 26 card of the Mid-Eastern Wrestling Federation.

Another capacity crowd, about 500, was in attendance for the card put together by promoter Dennis Wipprecht.

1)  The Goodfellas (Dino Casanova & Romeo Valentino), pinned Leather & Lace (“Insatiable” Adrian Hall & “Ramblin'” Rich Carlyle), in 10:52, as manager Royce Prophet distracted referee Jeff Jones, allowing the healthy Goodfella to illegally replace his groggy partner in the ring.

2)  The 10-man Battle Royal was won by Joe Thunder in 8:38. “Hollywood” Bob Starr was the next to last in the ring. The others, from third-from-last down to first eliminated, were: Kabuki Kid, Morgus the Maniac, “Outrageous” Ricky Lane, Johnny Taylor, Quinn Nash, Mark Shrader, DP Ferguson, and Billy Brat.

3)  The Ultimate Comet kept his Mid-Atlantic heavyweight title by pinning Lucifer (Knight of the Road), in 10:17.  Not even the interference of Lucifer’s manager “Stud” Lee Osborne and bodyguard The Freak of Nature could prevent his being pinned.

4)  Dr. Pain, a protégé of Axl Rotten, debuted by pinning the Kabuki Kid after choke-slamming him at 1:30.  I could hear “911” cheers from the peanut gallery.

5)  Mad Dog O’Malley defended his MEWF championship by pinning The World’s Greatest Wrestling Clown in 1:07. His Dogness then proceeded to put his belt up against anyone else who wanted to try him. He disposed of Billy Brat first, then Johnny Taylor.  Then the Ultimate Comet came out and proceeded to wear O’Malley down.  He had him down for the pin but unfortunately referee Dave the Wave had been bumped. By the time Dave came to, Corporal Punishment had beat the hell out of Comet and it was the Corporal who Dave counted on top of O’Malley for the pin.  Corporal Punishment is the new MEWF champion.  After the match, the other referee, Jeff Jones, came to the ring and berated Dave the Wave for his work in the last match.  Dave took exception and the two refs. started to brawl.  It reminded me of the many fights I have had to break up in school cafeterias during my teaching career. Axl Rotten, Dr. Pain and the Ultimate Comet finally pulled the two apart, coming to Dave’s aid and chasing Jeff from the ring.  Both refs. issued a challenge, and a Dave-vs.-Jeff match will occur next month at Bingo Bill’s.  I assured ring announcer and table-mate Al Albert that a similar challenge match between the two of us would never occur. As I made my way back to the dressing rooms for intermission I noticed that The Clown, Taylor and Brat were still lying unconscious on the floor near ringside.

6)  Sweet & Sour (“Luscious” Johnny Brown and Rob Noxious), beat Mason Dixon (Bulldozer Benton & JR Willett), for the MEWF Tag Team title in 11:04.  Mike Khoury and John Crystal were at ringside, observing both teams.  Perhaps they are the next contenders.

7)  The Cat Burglar may have lost his mask several minutes into the match but he did win the MEWF Light-Heavyweight title from Mark “the Shark” Shrader (managed by Isis) in 4:49.

Between the seventh and eighth matches, longtime local manager Joe Cool returned to the wrestling scene after an absence of over a year. He conducted a “Cool’s Corner” interview with Billy Brat. Billy’s apology to the fans for his recent behavior was interrupted by Corporal Punishment who beat up Billy and declared him a POW.

8)  Luna Vachon pinned Malia Hosaka in 5:06. Great action, nice to look at. These 45-year-old hormones thank The Big Guy Upstairs for giving me the seat closest to this action for the past three nights (I time kept for NWL cards in Pennsylvania & West Virginia the two previous nights–refer to last week’s RR).

9)  Axl Rotten (seconded by Dr. Pain), pinned the Metal Maniac (managed by Royce Prophet) in 10:14. For the third consecutive night Royce Prophet did NOT get pantsed –this may be a record.

10)  In the main event, Superfly Jimmy Snuka (for whom the crowd mega-popped), pinned Johnny Polo (managed by Isis), in 10:58 after a Superfly Leap off the top rope.

The MEWF has scheduled two cards for April:

Friday, April 21 — at St. Mary’s College in St. Mary’s in southern Maryland.  Matches on the schedule include Tito Santana vs. Bastion Booger, Jimmy Snuka vs. Nikolai Volkoff, the Rock & Roll Express vs. the Goodfellas.  Also on the card — the Wrestling Clown, Johnny Gunn, and (for the first time ever in Maryland) Dan Severn.

Sunday, April 23 — back at Bingo Bill’s, Old Eastern Ave. & Stemmers Run Rd. in Essex, Md., near Baltimore. Call 410-792-1122, the MEWF Hotline, for directions. Already signed are the Rock & Roll Express vs. the Goodfellas, Dan Severn (making Baltimore area debut against yet-unnamed opponent), and the Jeff Jones vs. Dave the Wave referees’ grudge match.  Promoter Dennis Wipprecht announced he is also hoping to sign former WWF champ Yokuzuna for a match against the people’s choice Axl Rotten.

WHAT YOU MISSED: a look at RIC FLAIR & VADER going nuts last week on WCW SATURDAY NIGHT . . . a replay of THAT HH GUY and RANDY SAVAGE asking NICK BOCKWINKLE to reinstate Flair . . . JOHNNY B. BADD defeated PAUL ORNDORFF by pinning PAUL ROMA. In the closing moments of the match Orndorff accidentally elbowed the ref. while Roma tripped Badd.  Orndorff went for a piledriver but Badd powered out of it.  Frustrated, Orndorff ran at Badd with a charging clothesline while Roma went to the top rope, but Badd ducked and Orndorff accidentally knocked Roma off of the top rope.  As Roma fell into the ring Badd immediately covered him for the pin . . . a look back at AVALANCHE vs. RANDY SAVAGE from WCW SATURDAY NIGHT, which ended with THE THREE FACES OF FEAR apparently breaking up . . . STEVE AUSTIN used the ropes for leverage to pin MARCUS ALEXANDER BAGWELL . . . a look at THE BLUEBLOODS dining out and buying clothes . . . STING had an easy time with BUTCHER; after the match KEVIN SULLIVAN came into the ring and argued with Butcher . . .

WHAT YOU MISSED: Comments from LEX LUGER and TATANKA on their big cage match scheduled for later in the show . . . BOB BACKLUND defeated JEFF JARRETT by DQ in the Inter-Continental match when RAZOR RAMON interfered.  After the match THE ROADIE, Jarrett & Backlund attacked Razor, who was saved by BRET HART & THE 123 KID . . . a replay of an interview with LT . . . BAM BAM BIGELOW defeated SEONE of THE HEADSHRINKERS . . . an interview with DIESEL, which started twice due to technical difficulties; SHAWN MICHAELS & SID interrupted it but did nothing to follow up their threats . . . a WRESTLEMANIA report . . . LEX LUGER used his loaded metal elbow to defeat TATANKA in the steel cage main event . . . SALT & PEPPA did a WMXI promo . . . and things ended with a quickie interview with BRET HART . . .

You probably all know what a travesty this PPV was so I will try not to say much. However I am not promising anything.

The Main Event as you all know was That HH Guy and Vader in a strap match. You must drag YOUR OPPONENT to all 4 corners of the ring w/o having your momentum broken. First of all, at the beginning Ric Flair still had the makeup on (from an earlier incident where dressed in drag in order to attack Randy Savage), which really disgusted me. Next the entrance of the “Renegade” was really retarded. How dumb do they think we are (we must be pretty stupid considering we spend $30 for this crap)?

This match was a wreck. The focus was on Flair being abused and molested by the Renegade rather then the match, which may have been a blessing in disguise. The end came when HH took the strap put it on Flair and drug him around. “Ha Ha very funny, lets continue the match (ring ring), what the %#@%$%%@$%*^^#*???” My words exactly when that happened. I knew HH was powerful at WCW but I didn’t know he could win a match against a man he was not even wrestling. In my opinion this was the biggest disgrace since HH won the belt. This goes beyond the “Hulkamania thing” this is just blatant disregard for pre-match stipulations and statements. If there was a “beat the manager” clause it would be a different story . . .

In other news the Uncensored actions of Dustin Rhodes and Barry Darsow got them fired. Is there an irony to this? . . .  The only thing that was actually funny was the food fight . . .  The best match of the evening in my opinion was Sting and Big Bubba. If I were Sting I would watch out. How could he agree to lose to this stooge? I better go now. I am sure you get the idea on how BAD this card was . . .

Well the WWF continues the media blitz. This week LT will train in the middle of Times Square and fans are welcome to attend. Isn’t it going to be a bit too cold?? Plus on Home Shopping Channel at 8 PM they are selling WM merchandise. By the way I checked and it’s Dan Akroyd on Saturday Night Live this week not Diesel and LT. Well here goes with the WM predictions. Don’t worry I’m not going to include any long explanation of the match just the winner.

1) Shawn – Diesel . . . Shawn by pinfall. Here is my first risk, not much Sid interference.

2) Bam Bam – LT . . . Because Shawn wins belt WWF keeps fans happy when LT wins because of outside interference.

3) Owen and my 2nd big risk Chris Benoit (I’m 99% sure it will be Yokozuna. The other 1% goes to the 123 Kid. This is just wishful thinking) win the Tag team titles. BTW I could be conservative but I’m guessing Ross will have enough influence to make my predictions work out.

4) Backlund submits to Hitman.

5) Blu Brothers beat Smith and Luger. I’m putting a screwjob for this one.

6) JJ retains his title.

7) Undertaker pins Bundy but (another risk), something very different happens after or perhaps during the match. You will be surprised!

Since the recent WM reports have focused on the two big matches I’m not sure if this is the entire card but this is all I could remember.

I like Steve McMichaels, his performance on RAW was great. Hope to see him play a part at WM. Possibly helping LT win. When he pushed Kama and then said, “Now, Go away.” I couldn’t stop laughing. Check the tape it’s hilarious.

Finally something has been done with the Bret is a racist angle. Hakushi attacked him when he was receiving an award from the Japanese press and moonsaulted onto Hart onto the ground from an interview platform! Has somebody been watching ECW??

This weeks WrestleMania moment was a big surprise. It featured HH Vs. Andre!?!? This goes against the WWF’S old policy of when they are gone they don’t exist. They did emphasize it was a long time ago and also said it was, “HH Vs. The Late, Great, Hall of Famer Andre the Giant!!” But it does say something about the way the WWF is handling things now. I just realized something . . . no Doink at WrestleMania!!!

The prospect of the 3 way Dance has me excited. Of course it means my WM prediction of Benoit showing is completely incorrect.

Finally a big congratulations to all involved in getting Public Enemy on-line. Thanks for giving us the opportunity to chat with them.

When I read in Pro Wrestling Torch that the WWF drew a near sellout at MSG last weekend, I fell out of my chair. Really I did. This shows one of two things or both: 1)The LT angle was well worth it, despite LT’S lack of wrestling ability, 2) The Jim Ross/Vince McMahon era is bringing back fans. I would like to say a little of both, but I got to be truthful and admit it is mostly LT, and the media circus. However Ross and McMahon’s new way of booking, is very likely to keep some of these fans that are “Coming Back”. I’d say that Marketing 101 class McMahon took is doing wonders for the WWF, or something like that.

I’m not going to comment on what WCW has been trying to push down our throats. It has been covered enough, plus I don’t feel like wasting my time. But news from WK is there is a new guy in charge of WCW. That didn’t come out right. Turner shifted his companies around, and there is a new head guy leading up the area WCW falls in. Can’t tell if it’s bad news or not, well I can. He has no wrestling industry experience, and he wants to push the HH stuff.

Other news is Jerry Jarrett was hired as a consultant to turn things around. Nothing against Jerry, (Although he didn’t do much for the WWF, except for the Quebecers, and the ladder match at WM), but when is WCW going to learn that the old school leaders can’t turn stuff around. Yes JJ will help a little, but why not go for Paul Heyman. Old school is gone, they need something NEW. I do hope that Jerry tries to start up the feeder system like he talk about in Torch Talks a few years back. Turner’s got the money to do it, nut will he?

News that Rhodes, Bully, and Graham were all fired for bleeding when told not to is a joke. It should not happen, but it did. Why they ignored orders is beyond me, (I mean if I was told not to blade I would say “Thank You” and get in the ring and wrestle), but this all seems weird. I’m not going to make suggestions to what happened, but I hope that Dustin (AND AUSTIN, but I’m dreaming here, at least for now), will end up in the WWF.

On Sunday, WCW is reshowing WCW Uncensored, at Noon and 7 PM. Who is the brain behind that? At Noon you already have the Action Zone, plus the Magic vs. the Lakers on NBC, then at 7 PM you have the WWF Sunday Night Slam, with better matches for free. What is that?

Also I just saw the little skit they filmed with HH and Savage demanding Flair in the ring. HH said something to the effect that Nick can say Flair is banned from the WCW, but that doesn’t do anything. But did HH think about what he was saying. For the past 2-3 weeks he was banned from WCW Sat. and it kept him out. Is that not a double standard?

My mother is woefully undereducated as far as the electronic frontier is concerned. She calls the Internet the Intersect. But, it is her birthday and I’m the finest of sons. So . . .  happy birthday, Mom (EDITOR’S NOTE: HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO MIKE’S MOM!). This one is dedicated to you. And, as you would wander from subject to subject, so too will this week’s column.

Something remarkable has been happening in the WWF of late. I call it the Ross Effect, but it has been making their shows that much more enjoyable. Did you know that Mantaur actually has a real name and went to college? Did you know that Diesel actually has a real name and went to college? Ever hear a face announcer demean a face wrestler’s ring attire? (Are you listening, Doink?) There is a flurry of realism flying through the WWF these days and it’s a welcome change. Keep up the good work.

Now to the bad news about the WWF. Women’s Champion . . . ring a bell? Alundra Blayze writes a point/counterpoint lovelorn column for the magazine with Shawn Michaels, but is rarely seen or mentioned on TV. Bull Nakano appears on Raw with no mention of her title status. Get behind the belt or drop it again. Don’t just leave it hanging.

Have you noticed the effect that Sid has been having on Shawn? All of a sudden there’s less dancing, less pomp and more circumstance. Shawn is now sporting a two day growth and a more serious attitude. Luckily, Michaels is one of the few wrestlers who can carry off these transitions with such flair (no pun intended).

Vader should have completely trounced what’s his name by now. But in the no logic world of WWFjr what do you expect. On a no rules PPV, Savage wins via DQ? HH wins by dragging Flair around the ring? Bischoff needs help badly. Bischoff needs help now!

As I look back, this column marks my 30th for the Ring Report. Yes, it is huge compared to when I started. No, I would not cut anything. If I don’t want to read something, I pass by it. Censorship is a plague practiced by alleged religious zealots and Republicans. The Ring Report provides room for you to make a personal choice. I’m glad that many of you spare a few minutes of your valuable time to read my column each week. More so, I’m glad that MadDog and company provide a huge amount of their time and effort each week to bring you this concise rundown of the wrestling world. (And how much are you paying for it anyway?)

Well, as you can see, we sort of missed the Sunday night at midnight Eastern deadline.

Umm . . .

Today is Friday, the last day in March, and it’s an afternoon where I’m sort of awake, which is nice since I’ve haven’t really been awake for the last week and a half and being awake has a lot going for it these days.

What happened?

My doctor describes it as “you were an idiot.”  What does that mean?  Well, I was an idiot.  I was running around with little or no sleep for quite sometime there and my body sort of decided to talk back to me.

What does that mean?

Think . . .

“Sinus Infection from H3ll.”

In my ears, in my nose, in my eyes. I won’t go into the gory details (though the world famous ECW Giraffe is getting a package filled with green stuff one of these days — because, get this, he ASKED for it), because they’ll gross you all out. But needless to say I have not been in the greatest of shape for the last week and a half.  I’m feeling somewhat better (still don’t have all of my hearing back, but that’s another story), and I’m attempting to get two issues of the Ring Report out in three days.

Thanks go out to everyone who wrote in asking about my condition, even bigger thanks go out to the British Bombshell and Mr. ECW, who both doted over me on the phone all week long, and to all of you who gave a d@mn about the missing report — thank you.

Now, enough of me.  I found out that Jim Chamberlin AKA THE MASTER OF ALL HOLDS has been in the hospital and is under-going surgery this week.  Jim’s a great guy and I hope he recovers quickly and comes back from the Ring Report as soon as possible! While Jim isn’t at his computer right now his dad will print out all get well messages for him so please drop him a get well note at and brighten up his day — get well soon Jimbo — we do miss you!

Okay, I’ll be back Sunday night (late night), with our WrestleMania issue so be here and bring your decongestants — I’m going to need ’em! 🙂


MADDOGJMF & Company!





DENNIS MILLER, NEWS, ECW & SMW Reporter: 73633,1651 on CSERVE